Below is the Second Part of my recent interview series with Republicans. This interview occurred after the New York City indictment against Donald Trump was unsealed.

Travis:   Yesterday the 34 Count Indictment was unsealed and released to the public.  What is your initial reaction?

Republicans:      Clearly, this prosecution is motivated solely by politics.  Alvin Bragg is a puppet of the liberal, socialist, transgender, mainstream media, deep state.  Alvin Bragg is a left-wing George Soros prosecutor.

Travis:   You have said that before.  But, now we know that there are 34 Counts of Falsifying Business Records.  What are your thoughts on the actual felonies charged.

Republicans:      What about Hillary Clinton? She did the same thing in the 2016 presidential election.  Where are the charges against her?  Rioters burned Portland and New York City but there were no prosecutions.  Why isn’t Alvin Bragg bringing charges related to the Hunter Biden laptop?  Hmm?  Maybe because he is a Democrat?  What about the classified materials found at Joe Biden’s home! Tell me Mr. Mainstream Media why are there no charges against sleepy Joe?

Travis:   Ok.  But do you want to specifically address the 34 Felony Counts against Trump?

Republicans:      Congressional Republicans will bring the full weight of their investigative authority against Alvin Bragg.  This Soros-backed DA cannot be allowed to bring political prosecutions with impunity.

Travis:   Well… your plan sounds an awful lot like the weaponization of government against a political opponent.

Republicans:      This is completely different.  Alvin Bragg is backed by the liberal, socialist, transgender, mainstream media, deep state.   Government officials cannot use their power to investigate and prosecute their political opponents.

Travis:   So, it is your position that the power of Congress should be utilized to investigate Alvin Bragg, a Democrat, because the grand jury indicated Trump on 34 felonies?

Republicans:      Yes, we are glad you understand.  We intend to use every tool at our disposal to expose the liberal, socialist, Soros-backed Democrat Alvin Bragg for his crimes against Donald Trump.

Travis:   In other words, you want to weaponize the powers of congress to investigate a political opponent?

Republicans:      Yes!

Travis:   Isn’t that exactly what you are critiquing Alvin Bragg for doing?

Republicans:      Yes!... wait… no.  This is completely different.  Donald Trump did nothing wrong!  The payments to Stormy Daniels did not even come from campaign funds.  Whereas, Alvin Bragg continues to commit crimes against President Trump.  Alvin Bragg should be disbarred and removed from office, immediately.  Honestly, we do not even need an investigation, everyone knows he is a criminal.

Travis:   You do not see the hypocrisy?

Republicans:      We have never been hypocritical in our lives!  Donald Trump has never, and could never commit a crime.  It is unconstitutional, illegal and anti-American to charge him or even investigate him as a former President.  However, Alvin Bragg, Hillary Clinton, Joe Biden and Hunter Biden should all be prosecuted to the fullest extent of the law because they are part of the liberal, socialist, transgender, mainstream media, deep state.

Travis:  Wow.  In any event, the charges here are for falsifying business records.  Based on the charging documents, and everything already publicly known about the hush-money payments, it seems that proving that business records were falsified will be pretty easy.  Would you care to comment on the actual charges?

Republicans:  The thing to understand about Alvin Bragg and the liberal, socialist, transgender, mainstream media, deep state, is that, while their target is Donald Trump, they are really out to get all of the freedom-loving Trump supporters throughout the country.  They want to destroy Trump but also destroy all Americans who believe in the freedom to own guns, freedom to force a woman to carry a child to full term, freedom to discriminate against transgender persons, and freedom to believe that Christians are the primary victims of hate crimes.  When Pres. Trump was indicted all of America was indicted!

Travis:  What does that even mean…?

Republicans:      This is about power.  This is about the Democrat party with its liberal, socialist, transgender, deep state support retaining its power and position at all costs.  The case against Trump has nothing to do with the law, nobody has ever been prosecuted for falsifying records.  The Democrats want to hold their power over this country at any and all costs!  They don’t care if an innocent, god-fearing, duly elected President gets in their way!

Travis:   You do not really believe this country is controlled by Democrats, do you? Republicans control the U.S. House of Representatives, correct?

Republicans:      Yes!

Travis:   Republicans control 56 state legislative chambers, and Democrats control only 41.  There are 26 Republican Governors and only 24 Democratic.

Republicans:      Yes!

Travis:   Republicans have a 6 to 3 supermajority on the U.S. Supreme Court and control 27 State Supreme Courts.  While Democrats control only 16 State Supreme Courts with the remainder split.

Republicans:      Yes!

Travis:   By the numbers, the GOP holds the lion’s share of political power in this Country.

Republicans:      Yes!... wait… we mean, No!  The liberal, socialist, transgender, mainstream media, deep state controls everything and will stop at nothing to maintain its power!  Including, prosecuting an innocent man on trumped up charges, no pun intended.

Travis:  Oh boy.  But setting all of that aside, do you have any comment on the 34 Counts of Falsifying Business records?

Republicans:      Did we already mention weaponization of government; the purely political motivation behind the charges; prosecuting Alvin Bragg; prosecuting Hillary, Joe and Hunter; the idea that an attack on Trump is an attack on America and that the left will stop at nothing to maintain its power?

Travis:   Yes.  You said all that already.

Republicans:      Ok great. (mumbling to an aid – “Make sure Donald knows we used all of his talking points and be sure to kiss the ring.”). 

Travis:   So, I’ll ask one last time.  Do you have any comment on the actual charges unsealed yesterday?

Republicans:      What have we been saying this whole time!

Travis:   Anything other than addressing the 34 felony Counts of Falsifying Business records contained in the unsealed indictment.

Republicans:      Did Alvin Bragg charge Richard Gere with Falsifying Business Records when he made payments to Julia Roberts and saved her from the sex trade?  No, he didn’t.  That speaks volumes.

 

Special thanks to Rep. Marjorie Taylor-Greene, Rep. Matt Gaetz, Rep. Jim Jordan, Sen. Ted Cruz, Rep. Thomas Massie, Rep. Kevin McCarthy, Rep. Paul Gosar and Sen. Josh Hawley for providing inspiration for this post.  Without your public statements, Facebook posts and tweets, writing satire might be difficult!  I wrote this satirical interview, but everything is paraphrased from or inspired by actual statements of the esteemed lawmakers listed above.